Friday, April 13, 2007

.alt>rant n rave!

Customer Service Representatives make me ill and I am over being Mr. Nice Guy.

Example #1.
Thanks for nothing.
Why is it that I am the one who says "thank you" after getting back my change or credit card from the Ross Dress For Less lady? Shouldn't she be thanking me for taking my money? I realize my purchase may be a measly pair of Adidas irregular ankle socks but what the hey.
I am the customer...aren't I? Don't I deserve some respect?
Pay attention the next time you check out at the grocery or department store. Fight the urge to say thank you for nothing. See what happens. I think we say thank you quickly at the cash register because we don't want to be disappointed when the cashier doesn't say thank you to us as it should be.

Example #2.
Eat me!
I was at a restaurant the other night and my friends meal came out cold. He sent it back. My dinner sat there and started to get cold waiting for his. He told me to start eating. I did ...and finished. Then his came out. But I was done. Miserable.
When the bill came....did they comp his meal? No!
I asked our server to send over the manager. He came over. I explained the situation and his answer was "I am sorry you had a bad experience.... Tell me, what can I do to make it better?"
This burns me to no end.
"First thing you need to do is your job. Don't put me in the position of telling you what you need to do..... It's bad enough that I had to suffer through this crappy meal now you are making it so that I have to rectify this particularly disappointing experience."

Example #3
The ultimate F.U.
Have you ever been on the phone for a hour and a half with customer service who doesn't do a thing to help you and then when it is all over says "Your business is very important to us. Is there anything else I can do for you? Can I be of any further assistance?" The anger is only heightened when they try to sell you something you don't want or need before they let you go.
I have decided the next time this happens this will be my response-
"Hey I know these calls are monitored so I just want to go on the record to say that you have been absolutely no help. Have I given you any indication that you have been of service to me in anyway? If so, let me make it clear that you have not. You did not answer my questions or give me the answers I have been looking for from you and you alone. In fact, you have wasted a good deal of my valuable time for which I am going to bill your company for reimbursement. May I have the address where I should send the invoice?"

Wonder what kind of scripted response they have for that one.

The Rave!
I was going to write a post about the whole Don Imus mess but truly Kendall says it best and sums it all up here and here.
So as my Aunt Hilda used to say "Why Botha?".
Oh plus he puts a pretty picture up every time he posts something if you are into that sort of thing.
Hmmmmm....I wonder if that is why I check out The Way I see it everyday.


Kendall said...

thanks for the shout out Mike!

As for Customer Service.... isn't that an oxy-moron these days?

Bobby said...

Michael, just have a vodka tonic and don't let it get to you..

if not, I have some meds that make you feel so much better about things cause you just don't feel anymore...

Just Kidding.. not really.. sure I am!


Anonymous said...

I can add a simple tactic that makes me feel so much better about the terrible customer service I receive. About a year or so ago, I started to go out of my way to reward good customer service. For instance, when I sign the credit card bill at a restaurant, I generally will write "Thank you for great service" and circle the name of the server. Or, comment cards at the supermarket...I suggest you try the positive approach and I guarantee you will be remarkably surprised about how much the service around you's like they all talk to eachother...'that's the guy who wasn't an asshole'. It also made me realize an interesting fact...that I get decent service alot more than I think, like a 10 to 1 ratio in fact, and, that makes me feel a little bit like I was wrong to blow up the situation with the moron Verizon rep into such a federal case in my head.

On another more obnoxious related note, I like to beat waiter's or waitresses to the punch by anticipating their silliness. Like I'l say when they come over to my table before they can speak, ' name is Steve and I'll be your customer tonite"...that pisses them off....Or when I order a burger and fries, and they ask how would you like it done, I like to say "crinkle cut'...and watch them get thrown off there game. SG

Dr. Sparky said...

I promise to always service you well.

Paul said...

Don't get me started ... there's nothing that I like better than arguing with customer service reps when I think that I have been inconvenienced. Circular logic is my specialty.

Steven said...

As a customer, I am always saying "Thank you", but I look at it more as a "This conversation/transaction is over with. I have to go now." There have been times on occasion when buying a big-ticket item I will actually say, "You're welcome" before I will get a "Thank you."

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