Rosie leaving "The View"

Rosie will announce her resignation on today's "The View". This story was first brought to our attention by .alt>mike chief New York correspondent "Bobby In the City" this morning at 7am. Bobby may be old...but he still sharp as a tack.

Sad sad. I feel sad because I love Rosie and I feel sad because she just can't seem to settle down and enjoy the success.

ALTernating channels- Rosie Gives Up

Say what you will about Rosie but I love her.
For me it was a very sad moment on "The View" when she basically threw her hands up the morning after the Virginia Tech massacre and said
"We will never have gun control in this country".

When Rosie gives up, it isn't a good.

ALTernating channels

This is my every so often review of what is happening on the tube. The child below is of no relation, thank you very much. It is our "ALTernating channels" poster child.... changing the channel as we move from one show to another.

AMERICAN IDOL ON FOX

Did you see little Ashley on American Idol last night? She wasn't one of the contestants but she stole the show with her lack of restraint. Watch the youtubes below if you need to catch up or get a refresher. Anyway I just have to let her know what I am thinking....

Dear Ashley,

You had me at *sniffle*. I was with you little one. Sanjaya was rocking the house. You couldn't control yourself...I was almost crying myself. Finally, an American Idol moment that Sanjaya could OWN!!!!

And then THIS happened:



Ashley, why the hell are you crying for Nell Carter Melinda Doolittle?
And at the end of the show you were crying for everyone else for crying out loud get a grip Ashley.

Don't get me wrong I love Nell Melinda . I love her 40 year old self. Oh puleez. Every morning I wake up and wonder "Is this the morning the Smoking Gun is going to expose her true age and that she is a mother of 3 with a prison record?"
They keep asking her if she is as nice as she says she is. Geez if someone asked me that question even I would say I was nice too! What are you going to say? "No Simon, I am an evil, evil, old bitter jaded person."
Even if she "pulls one over" the media... to what end? Ok so she is going to win American Idol....and do what? Vegas? Carnival Cruise Lines? Bottom line Melinda can sing like nobody's business but she isn't going to sell records to a pop audience and silly me I thought that what American Idol was all about. That is why I am with Sanjaya, or Jordin Sparks. These two are the total package and they have the ability to sell a lot of records to a lot of young people.

Oh and Ashley, if I can offer you but one piece of advice it would be this. Give your heart. But be selective. In later years you may find the quarterback of your high school football team to be attractive, but that doesn't mean you have to love your way through the linebackers, defensive ends, and cornerbacks to get to him. Do you understand what I am getting at here Ashley? Trust me, I know.

PS- I think it is curtains tonight for Stephanie. If you are saying "Who dat?" there, in itself, lies the problem with Stephanie.

WORKOUT ON BRAVO


I am not a lesbian.
If I was, I would probably watch the "L" Word on Showtime.

But I would never ever ever miss an episode of "Workout" on Bravo which started it's second season last night. Why? Because lesbos need their ultimate fantasies just like gay guys. Just in case you don't know the premise of this reality-esque show, it is a supposedly unscripted series detailing the dramas at an elite Beverly Hills gym called Sky Sport & Spa. The show chronicles the demanding owner's efforts to build the business, manage her trainers and satisfy her select clientele.

Translation- Jackie the power bitch gets to boss around everyone in her gym! Big strappin' straight and gay guys just about fall to their knees and hang on her every word. All kinds of women want to be her, want to be like her, want to be with her.

But there are plenty of reasons for guys like us to watch too-

One of the upcoming plots (according to last night's coming attractions) involves a very buff male model who enlists the services of "Jesse" one of the gay male personal trainers who insists that Mr. Model remove his shirt to expose his chiseled chest before he starts his workout with him.

Bravo!

I mean, you can meet the cast of "Workout" on the Bravo website .
If you missed any episodes from last season or this season's premiere, don't worry they will play it like six hundred times overs the next week.

Till next time ALTernating Channels over and out.

The Answer- "A One In a 25 Million Chance"

The Question- "What are the odds of a three way tie in JEOPARDY?"

It happened on Friday for the first time ever-

American Idol- The Saga of Antonella

She sucked last week.
She sucked this week.
Apparently....
She may have sucked....alot.

And I say....
So what!

She should be off the show because she sucked.
Not because she may have.... sucked.

American Idol- It Pays to be Pretty (Shitty)

According to American Idol predictions the 2 top men vote getters this week (meaning they are NOT going home) are Sanjaya Malakar (pretty) and Sundance Head (shitty).

For the women its of course Lakisha ("And I am telling you I am not going") Jones and um......Antonella Barba (pretty/shitty).

It looks like those that are just plain boring are going to get their walking papers tonight:
Men: Paul Kim (damn I want him to stay to satisfy my foot fetish), Nicholas Pedro (who?)
Women: Amy Krebs ("I can't make you love me, if you don't...." ....we don't), Alania Alexander ("I'm special.....so special...."....no you are not).

Apparently Paul Kim has wasted no time in thinking about his next career move. He got his shoes on and is hard at work here.

Introducing Joss Stone.....Again

I laughed my ass head off this morning watching VH1's Top 20 Countdown. There at number 20 was the "latest", "defining", and "groundbreaking" video from Joss Stone. "Tell Me 'Bout It" is the first single from her new CD- "Introducing Joss Stone" (though a better title might be "Reintroducing Joss Stone" or better yet "Take Joss Stone.....PLEASE!")
Have you heard of Joss? If so, you must watch gobs of VH1 because that is really the only place you can hear her music in the states. The video channel has tried relentlessly to shove this "teenage blue eyed soul queen" down our throats for the past 3 years though she has yet to take off. To me, she just doesn't sound authentic. A soul diva needs...um... soul and I don't hear it in her music. Yes it is true she is a Grammy Award nominee and that one of her songs even landed in Billboard's top 10 for an ever so brief stint.
To that I say....hmmmmmmm.

I just find it amazing how VH1 sticks with Joss through thick and thin.
What a loyal beast.

I wish VH1 was my boyfriend.

A Message to the Lead Pussycat Doll

Dear Lead Pussycat Doll,

I certainly don't want to come off as "catty", but after seeing your performance on the American Music Awards it has become apparent that the time has come to leave the group and put the other Dolls out of their misery. The bottom line? You sing, they don't. Don't worry Lead Pussycat Doll, those four must be keenly aware that they are well into 13 of their big 15 minutes....and they should have nine lives each to practice until they get it right. Let them move on, or retire, or partner up with the remnants of Destiny's Child and open a burger joint called "LEFTOVERS".

By the way Lead Pussycat Doll....what the hell is your name anyway?